red sox are up 3-0! i kind of wish they'd lose a few so they can win the title at home, but i have a feeling that is not to be. ah, well, a win is a win, right?

i'm tired. physically tired, yes, i've been physically tired since college, but also just tired of the way things are. i'm tired of my job. i'm tired of feeling like i'm not qualified for any of the jobs that are out there. i'm tired of not getting interviews. i'm tired of feeling pressured to go back to school when i'm not ready to. i'm tired of not having any money. i'm tired of paying too much for rent to a landlady who lets her bathtub flood my kitchen (yes, again). i'm tired of being far away from people i care about. i'm tired of our country being run by a boob who doesn't care about anyone but the top 1% moneymakers. i'm tired of the hotel strikers screaming outside my window. i'm tired of people hurting and manipulating my friends. i'm tired of stupid people. i'm tired of fake lip-synching pixie girls who get record contracts handed to them when the rest of us have to work for a living. i'm tired of sleeping alone. i'm tired of my body falling apart at age 25. i'm tired of loan companies that are trying to screw over my friends.

yes, there are good things in my life, and i'm sure i'm just being whiny and pms-y, but sometimes all the frustrations just bubble over and i get this way.

why do we tie ourselves up so much in toxic friendships? we build relationships with people based on concurrent locations and activities, and once the history is established we feel as though we need to maintain those relationships even when they turn ugly. i'm just as guilty of this as the next person, and have been burned by it. i care about people and want to maintain the relationship we once had, but as people we all grow and change... and many times, we do not grow and change the same ways that other people do. one day we'll learn that it's okay to move on...